im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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