everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
