My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
