He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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