I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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