So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Found the puke drawer
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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