If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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