we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
