yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
