Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
