I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
he's gonorrhea incarnate
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
