he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
