Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I believe in your delicious
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
