I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Randomize
