i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
