i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Randomize
