Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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