I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
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