I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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