NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
