i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
