Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
