Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
