at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
