Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
