matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
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