Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
