i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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