yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
