i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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