yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
