Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Randomize
