Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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