Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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