Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
