Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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