You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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