Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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