Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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