I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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