I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
