Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
