Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
