Don't you send me to vm
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Randomize
