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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  there's paper in my vomit.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  So I'm banging this nun...

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...

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• (516): View more from New York

  Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster

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• (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five

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• (517): View more from Michigan

  i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..

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• (619): View more from California

  So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.

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• (906): View more from Michigan

  As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back

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• (916): View more from California

  Yep. How's your hangover?

  (1-916): View more from California

  It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life

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• (938): View more from

  I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night

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• (253): View more from Washington

  Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”

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