ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize