i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
