Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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