Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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