And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
